The Awakening
by Maggiemay
Summary: Carol and Maggie have escaped the Saviours. Carol feels dead inside, realising what she has become. Can Daryl help her through this crisis of conscience? Or should she stick with what's safe, with Tobin. Some spoilers from Episodes 13 and 14. A Daryl/Carol fic.
1. Chapter 1

**So – this is the first fanfic that I have written in many, many years and I am very rusty! So please go easy on me...**

 **I love TWD, especially Daryl and Carol. This fic is intended to only be 2 or 3 chapters and it takes place at the end of Season 6, episode 13, with some spoilers taken from Episode 14. It begins after Carol and Maggie have escaped the Saviours.**

 **By the way, I often add song lyrics to my fics, because I love fics which combine with music. The song lyrics featured throughout this fic are from "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri.**

 **I do not own TWD or the characters. I hope you enjoy. Please read and review.**

 **Chapter One**

The RV rambled slowly through the gates of Alexandria, Rick at the wheel. His passengers were bruised, bloody and broken. Following closely behind was Daryl, finally reunited with his beloved bike. He pulled up alongside the RV, eager to get to Carol and talk with her. Something had happened out there, he wasn't exactly sure what, but when he, Rick and Glen had almost collided with her and Maggie at the entrance of the Saviour's safe house, Carol's demeanour had worried him. She had been different, she had been broken. Something was not right with her and he meant to find out what it was.

One by one, they alighted the RV, Maggie leaning on Glen for support, Carol following blindly, her eyes blank, her face a mask of nothingness.

Before Daryl could reach her, Tobin had appeared, running over to Carol and grabbing her by the shoulders, pulling her into an awkward embrace. Carol remained limp against him, her arms hanging by her side.

Daryl almost felt sorry for the guy. Would have felt sorry for him, if he didn't dislike him so much. He had been all over Carol like a fly on shit since they had arrived in Alexandria. What was he doing, putting his hands on her like that? He didn't know her, didn't have that right.

"Carol, thank god" Tobin breathed. He pulled back and eyed her curiously. "Carol? Are you okay"

She blinked, suddenly appearing to focus on her surroundings. She gave a small half smile. "I'm fine, Tobin" she said quietly. "Just fine. I need to get back to the house".

"I'll come with..." Tobin started.

"No" Carol cut him off. "I'm so tired. I just need to get home and crawl into bed." With that, she shook free of his grasp and walked slowly towards the home she shared with Rick, Michonne, Daryl and the children.

She felt the tears starting to prick at her eyes and her breath caught in her chest. She began to walk faster, trying so hard not to run – she could barely wait to get behind the door, shut herself away from everything, from everyone, to hide from the world.

Daryl watched her go, concern etched deep into his brow. She was not okay. She had told him that, back at the safe house. He had asked her if she was good and she had said no. He knew that something was very wrong. He fought the urge to go after her, he didn't want to push too hard. He would get his opportunity.

"Is she okay?"

Daryl had almost forgotten about Tobin, but now the other man stood before him. "Is Carol really okay?"

"She will be" Daryl muttered and started to push his bike slowly towards the house, not sure that he believed his own words.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

She hadn't come down for dinner, had told Michonne through the locked bedroom door that she wasn't hungry, that she was tired and just needed to sleep.

None of them had much of an appetite. Daryl pushed the food around his plate, his thoughts elsewhere. He needed to see her, make sure that she was...make sure that she was what? Okay? She certainly was not okay and he was worried.

Rick pushed his plate away and sighed, dropping his head into his hands. "Goddamit!" he cursed. "This is not how I wanted things to play out. We need to do something to stop Neegan, 'cos after today, I'm sure he's gonna come callin'. And Maggie, Carol...I don't know". He looked up at Daryl. "We need them strong. We need everybody strong. We can't afford to go down like this. Maggie's pregnant, she needs to lay low, but Carol...we need Carol." Rick clenched his fists and lightly thumped the table in frustration. "You think she's gonna be okay?"

Daryl pushed his chair back and stood up from the table.

"I'ma go talk to her" he mumbled, and made his way slowly towards the stairs.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

He knocked softly on her bedroom door. "Carol...S'me. Can I come in? Wanna talk to ya."

He heard the lock click, and his hand went to the doorknob, heart pounding, scared of what he would find on the other side. He hadn't seen Carol like this since...since Sophia.

He opened the door.

She was standing by the window, staring out into the night, hugging herself tightly. She had showered and had pulled on fresh clothes, cargo pants and a t-shirt.

She didn't turn around as he came in.

Daryl sank into the chair next to her bed and studied her closely. "You hurt?" he asked quietly.

She shook her head.

"You wanna tell me what happened in there?"

She turned slowly to face him, tears streaming down her cheeks.

His heart lurched and he fought the urge to jump up and pull her into his arms.

"They were gonna kill us. They were gonna kill you and the others. They were convinced that you were gonna ambush them, that Rick was setting them up. Maggie..." A sob caught in her chest. "We killed them. I didn't want to." She lowered her head into her hands, sobbing quietly now. "I told her to run. I didn't want to kill her. She wouldn't run...I didn't want to do it, I didn't want to kill anyone..."

"You had to" Daryl grunted. "None of us wants to kill people, Carol. But we gotta do what we gotta do to survive. You know that."

She regarded him and nodded slowly. "I know. But I hate it, Daryl. I hate what I've become".

Daryl leapt up and strode towards her, his large hands resting on her shoulders.

"You've become a survivor. You're strong, Carol. You 'aint nothin' like that little mouse you were when you was with Ed. Beaten down to nothin'. Not anymore. You do what you gotta do, Carol. We all do. You 'aint gotta like it".

He pulled her against him, and she let her body relax against his. His hands cradled her head and she sobbed against him. Her arms circled his waist and she felt herself melting against his chest. He stroked her hair, letting her cry against him.

When her sobs finally subsided, she pulled back and looked at him. Daryl gave a small smile and released her from his grip, walking over to the bed. He sat down on the edge, bent down and took off his boots, then settled himself against the pillows. He held his arms out to her. "C'mere" he grumbled.

Carol lay beside him and Daryl pulled her against him, and they lay like that for a while, content with each other's company. Daryl finally broke the silence.

"Did they touch you?" he half whispered, almost frightened to hear the answer.

"Not like that" she replied quietly. "The guy I shot...he came for me, kicked me a coupla' times."

Daryl winced. "You okay? You hurt? You need Denise to look at ya?"

"I'm okay" she whispered, touched by his concern for her, his tenderness. She smiled to herself She was broken. Her spirit had deserted her, and even though physically, her bruises would heal, Carol wasn't so sure about the rest of her.

Daryl pulled her close, as if he knew what she was thinking.

"Maybe you betta go" she said quietly. "People might talk".

"Let 'em talk" Daryl grunted. "I 'aint goin' nowhere"

He tightened his grip on her and closed his eyes. He was uncomfortable with the closeness, but every part of his body felt as if it were on fire, every nerve ending sprung to life and he wouldn't let her go.

…... "Time stands still

Beauty in all she is

I will be brave

I will not let

Anything take away

What's standing in front of me

Every breath

Every hour has come to this..."

XXXXX


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

He kneeled in front of the porch, tinkering with his bike. He was thrilled to have it back, couldn't believe that he had come across it again. Now, he just needed his crossbow..

His thoughts drifted to the night before, to Carol.

He had stayed with her until she had finally fallen asleep, and had then crept out in the early hours of the morning, sinking back into his own bed, laying awake in the darkness, feeling alive at having been so physically close to her. But he had cared about people talking. It embarrassed him, not because he was ashamed of his feelings, but because he had never been 'with someone' before. Sure, there had been plenty of drunk fumblings in the dark with women he barely knew, he wouldn't even be surprised if there had been a couple of Daryl-juniors floating around out there. But he had never been close to a woman. Hell, he'd never even been close to his own mama. She'd been a drunk and a crack head, who had laid in bed getting plastered. Had burnt to death in her own bed. Had left him and Merle to fend for themselves and to protect themselves against their violent and abusive old man. He didn't think too much of his mama, and on some level, he had the insight to know that she was the reason why he found it so hard to get close to women.

He'd never been nurtured, never been loved, and now, he didn't know how to love somebody else. He fumbled his way through life, hoped he was doing something right, but his past always caught up with him.

But there was something about Carol...he had felt it the first time he had met her, back in the quarry. She was like him in a lot of ways. She had been hurt, wounded...had almost been frightened of her own shadow. Daryl had been drawn to her from the beginning, had wanted to protect her, from the moment he saw Ed lay his hands on her. He had wanted to find her daughter, had wanted to make her pain go away. And he had failed. He couldn't save Sophia, couldn't bring her home.

He had watched her evolve over the years, become someone strong and capable, someone that everyone looked up to, aspired to be like. A survivor. Like him. A kindred spirit. And he felt something more, something that he wanted to suppress, but it was becoming so much harder to keep those feelings buried inside.

Carol had drifted away from him in the last few months, and he had found himself yearning for her company. When he had discovered that she and Maggie had been taken, his heart had sank. He had been terrified that he might not see her again.

Last night, when she had broken down before him and he had held her, it felt right. He knew that he had to somehow let her know but he didn't know how.

As if sensing her presence, Daryl looked up to find Carol standing beside his bike.

"I didn't even know you got it back. Your bike". She flopped down onto the step and pulled out a cigarette. She looked better this morning, he thought. He could see glimpses of the old Carol and he felt relief flood through his body.

Daryl sat beside her. "You got another one of those?"

She handed him a smoke and they sat in silence for a few moments.

She looked at him. "Those people you met. In the burnt out forest. They took it?"

"Yeah".

"You saved them". She looked at him, and his eyes darted down to his hands, studying his own fingers intently, flicking ash from his cigarette.

"Sorry" she mumbled. "That's who you are".

He turned to her, his voice rough. "I shoulda' killed 'em", he said.

Carol turned away and Daryl sensed that she was returning to that dark place.

"But you didn't" she whispered.

Daryl exhaled loudly. "Don't let Morgan's bullshit get to ya".

"But what if it's not bullshit Daryl? What if he's right? I'm not this person."

Daryl felt himself becoming frustrated, angry. What was wrong with her? "What the hell are ya talkin' 'bout? What person?"

He saw the tears begin to well in her eyes and immediately felt like an asshole, but he didn't like where she was heading and he wanted her to stop.

"The person who kills people" Carol said quietly. "Without a second thought. I'm not a killer, Daryl".

"No, you're not. You're a survivor. You think you kill people without a second thought? Then what is this? What's all this crap about, if you don't give a shit?"

A lonely figure caught his eye, and Daryl cursed under his breath, flicking his cigarette onto the ground.

Carol followed his gaze and her eyes fixed upon Tobin, standing 30 metres away, watching them.

"What d'ya see in that jerk, anyways" Daryl grumbled.

Carol turned to him, shocked by his sullen mood. "He's a good man" she replied.

Daryl got up and moved back to his bike. "Aint no good for you. Why ya' pretendin' to be some goddam Betty Crocker? He don't know you".

With that, Daryl go onto his bike, turned the key and revved the engine loudly, drowning out any chance Carol had of replying.

She felt the tears begin to trickle down her cheeks and slowly got up, walking inside the house, slamming the door behind her.


	3. Chapter 3

**The last two chapters. Guest - thanks for your review, which looks like it might have been removed now, because I can't find it? The beauty about fanfiction is that it is fiction and I can take the characters wherever I want them. Everyone interprets things differently, and I guess my interpretation of the characters is different to your interpretation, and that is okay :)**

 **By the way, peeps, I am an Aussie, so this is written from AU point of view, so apologies if some of the dialogue doesn't seem 100% true to the characters I try!**

Chapter 3

…... "Heart beats fast

Colours and promises

How to be brave

How can I love you when I'm

Afraid to fall..."

Carol dished out the casserole she had made, smiling sweetly. When she got to Daryl's plate, her smile faded and she refused to meet his eyes, looking intently at his plate, roughly heaping casserole onto it with a clunk of the ladle. He felt the icicles radiating off her and he sighed. He had messed up.

Rick and Michonne tried to make dinner a pleasant affair, attempting to engage the two in conversation, however Daryl and Carol sat across from each other, each avoiding the others' gaze. The tension was evident to everyone in the room, even Judith, who grizzled unhappily.

After dinner, Daryl disappeared into the adjoining garage to work on his bike. Rick helped Carol clear the dishes whilst Michonne settled Judith upstairs.

Rick eyed Carol curiously. "Everything okay?" he ventured slowly.

"Fine". Carol turned to look at him, sorry for having been so short with him. "I'm fine, Rick. Just a little tired."

"You sure that's all?" he questioned, not wanting to push.

"Yeah, I'm sure." Carol mustered up a smile. "I might go for a walk."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

She ventured out into the night,lighting a cigarette as soon as she had stepped off the porch. She began to walk, relishing having some time to herself to gather her thoughts. What had happened today?Why had Daryl been upset with her?

She thought about last night, how he had comforted her. He had been so soft and gentle, and it was a side of him that she knew had existed, but one that he didn't allow people to see.

Her stomach knotted at the thought of him. Part of her wanted to grab hold of him and plant kisses over his face, something that she had wanted to do for so long. But part of her was frightened of being rejected by him. He had made it clear that he was uncomfortable with intimacy, and while she suspected that he had feelings for her, she wasn't entirely sure what those feelings were, and she was scared to ask, in case she didn't get the answer that she secretly hoped for.

"Hi". The voice startled Carol out of her thoughts. Tobin sat on his porch, looking hopefully at her. _Shit._

"Hi yourself" Carol murmured. There was no getting out of this now.

"Care to sit for a while?" He patted the step beside him.

 _Not really_ she thought. _I don't need this. I don't want this._ "Sure". She sat beside him. Tobin was a nice man, and he was interested. Maybe he could give her what she needed, if she could just let herself feel...

Carol wrung her hands together, staring intently at the ground.

"I haven't really talked to you since you got back" Tobin started. "I was beginning to think that maybe you're avoiding me."

Carol felt her heart lurch. She didn't want to hurt this man. He was a good man, he didn't deserve this. "No, I'm not avoiding you" she began. She turned to look at him, and as she did, she saw the uncertainty in his eyes.

"It was pretty rough out there. I just needed some time to myself, time to gather my thoughts. Still do".

He considered this for a moment.

"What happened...before you left...between you and me..."Tobin stammered.

"It was wrong of me, Tobin" Carol interjected, "and I'm sorry. I'm not ready for that. I'm not sure I'll ever be ready for that".

Tobin looked down at his hands, nodding slowly. "I like you Carol. I like you a lot. I'm not going anywhere anytime soon. I'll be here if you change your mind".

Once again, Carol felt tears stinging her eyes. She swatted at them angrily. _What the hell is wrong with me?_ She reached out for Tobin's hand. "Thank you" she whispered, and with that, she got up and walked away, leaving Tobin staring after her in the darkness.


	4. Chapter 4

When Carol returned to the house, the living areas were deserted, Rick and Michonne had obviously retired for the evening. She could hear clanging from the garage and she realised that Daryl must still be working on his bike. She sighed, and shook her head. She couldn't leave things like this. Her daddy had always told her "never let the sun set on a quarrel" and she had always tried to live by that, although it had been challenging with Ed.

Carol didn't like where she and Daryl had left things today, and she was struggling to understand just what was going on between them.

She took a deep breath, and opened the door to the garage.

He looked up as she came in, and his eyes quickly darted downwards again.

She walked over to the tool bench to the side of where he was working and leaned herself against it, arms folded across her chest.

"Whatever I've done to make you mad..."she started slowly. "I'm sorry."

He glanced up at her and grunted. "Where ya been, anyway?" he asked quietly, studying her closely.

"Out walking. I saw Tobin."

Daryl snarled quietly and begin banging at the engine of his bike with a wrench.

"We talked.."

"I don't care whatcha did" Daryl exclaimed loudly.

Carol eyed him closely. "Well, seems like you do, seeing how you're getting so angry and all"...

"I 'aint angry!" Daryl yelled, as he caught his finger beneath the swinging wrench. "Goddamit!" he cursed, pulling his finger away, dropping the wrench on the floor. He shook his finger in pain, his face flushed, his hair falling across his eyes. "You're stupid! Stupid!" He spat out the words.

Carol recoiled as if he had hit her.

He immediately regretted his words, and took two strides towards her, the shame evident in his face. "Carol, I..." He couldn't finish, didn't know what to say.

He moved towards her, his hands running through his hair, and coming to rest at his sides, fists clenched.

He stood closely in front of her, heart pounding in his chest, breath ragged. Desire coursed through his body and he swallowed hard, his lips only inches from hers.

Carol's breath hitched in her chest and she slowly inched her face closer to his. Suddenly, his lips were crushing hers, his hands on either side of her face, and he pushed against her, slamming her back against the bench.

She responded hungrily, her hands at the back of his neck, pulling him closer. As his assault on her mouth continued, his hands moved beneath her shirt, roaming her curves, his rough fingers making their way into her bra.

She gasped as his mouth left hers and moved to her throat, kissing her greedily, panting against her. His hands moved back to the outside of her shirt and he started working at her buttons, fumbling with each one. Carol wasn't sure what was happening, but she didn't want it to stop. She pulled at his shirt, managing to get it off over his head, and her hands caressed his chest, relishing the feel of every muscle, every scar.

He fumbled at the zipper of her pants, and yanked them part way down her thighs. His hands were at his own trousers and before either of them really had a chance to think about what they were doing, Daryl had moved inside her and she was moaning softly against his mouth. His hands were rough, his movements against her were urgent and rushed. Their breathing was ragged and heavy, Daryl's head resting against her cheek, Carol holding tightly to his back until it was over and he had finished. He drew away from her and turned away in shame.

Carol reached out to place her hand on his bare shoulder, her heart beating wildly in her chest. Small beads of sweat covered her chest, her face flushed and her body tingling.

"Sorry" Daryl muttered, glancing shyly at her, fixing his pants. He grabbed his shirt, which had been discarded on the garage floor, and he walked out. Carol heard the front door close.

As she re-dressed, she ran her finger across her lips, lightly bruised from their encounter. Her body still trembled from his touch. For the first time in months, Carol felt alive.

She was suddenly filled with fear that Daryl would withdraw from her completely now, ashamed and embarrassed at this thing that had just happened between them.

She found him on the front step, bare chested, his shirt still in his hands. Carol continued buttoning her shirt, and sat silently beside him. She reached across for his hand. He turned to look at her and she was surprised to see his eyes filling with tears.

"You know how I feel about ya" he murmured in a low voice. "But I can't give ya what ya need, what ya deserve."

Carol reached out and touched her fingers to his lips. "I need this, Daryl. Just this".

Daryl squeezed her fingers, his eyes never leaving hers. "I don't know how to do this" he stammered. "I don't know how to be close to somebody. I'm scared that I'm not enough".

"Daryl" she breathed, her fingers tracing a line down his cheek. "You're more than enough. I don't need you to be anything that you're not. I just need you to be you."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Carol awoke, sun light streaming in through the window. She was surprised to find Daryl still beside her, fully clothed. At least he hadn't snuck out in the night like a guilty teenager. Her chin tingled from his stubble, and she was sore in places that hadn't been sore in years.

She smiled at the thought. It might not have been perfect, but it had happened and she felt wonderful. Daryl had awakened in her feelings that she never knew existed. She reached out to touch his face lightly. He stirred and opened one eye, looking up at her. "Whatcha doin'?" he grumbled.

She smiled. "I'm glad you're still here."

"I 'aint no romantic, or nothin', but I'ma always gonna be here."

She lowered her lips to his, and smiled into her kiss. She didn't have to pretend with Daryl. He knew her, knew who she was, and he still loved her.


End file.
